I’ll Miss You, Ron Ron.

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In light of the news of the Lakers amnestying Metta World Peace, I decided to write a haiku poem for one of the players that I’ve enjoyed watching more than almost anyone else in my time watching basketball. X’s and O’s aside, I’m going to miss watching the purple and gold play next season without the crazy dude wearing number 15.

You came in ‘09

And you replaced Ariza:

Ron Ron in LA.

 

I only knew you

As that fool in the Palace.

But man… you’re much more.

 

Heck, Jack Black is proud

Of all your Tenacious D.

Ball handlers be warned.

 

You were the spirit.

The man who made me smile.

Every single game.

 

Then the playoffs came

Kobe wanted his fifth ring.

You searched for your first.

 

At first you struggled,

But then you came through with that

Tip against Phoenix.

 

NBA Finals:

Where heroes are produced.

You became just that.

 

6 for 24

Mamba needed help. You gave

Twenty freaking points.

 

Your late three sealed it.

You earned that first ring. Alas!

Congratulations.

 

The press conference!

Thanking the psychiatrist!

You’re awesome, Ron Ron.

 

But that ring you won?

You raffled it off to fans

To raise mental health money.

 

People don’t see it,

Humanitarian Ron.

But you give so much.

 

The first year won me.

You had rightly earned respect.

You’re a true Laker.

 

Hustling unlike ANYONE

That I’ve seen play basketball.

Just endless effort.

 

Since then, you’ve battled.

It hasn’t been as easy.

Three hard fought seasons.

 

But beyond the crazy:

The name change and insane tweets,

Is a great person.

 

You can’t dribble, and

You can’t shoot efficient, and

You can’t jump that high.

 

Honestly, I laugh

As you screw up some fast breaks

Or pass to a fan.

 

But you’re just Metta

And you’re one of my favorites.

Sad to see you go.

 

I’ll remember you

As a goof, as eccentric,

And as a hero.

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