Lakers are a Dominant Pau Performance Away from Advancing

Pau Gasol needs a pep talk. Not one of those corny Lou Holtz talks peppered with 1950’s witticisms and clichéd sayings. He needs one of those profanity laced KB24 tirades that will put the fear of MJ in the Spaniard’s heart.

Pau, wake up!

You’re asleep at the wheel and your team has just merged onto three-peat highway!

Just think how much different this series against the Hornets would be if Gasol was the 22 and 12 Pau against New Orleans from the regular season. This thing would be over faster than Dennis Rodman’s marriage to Carmen Electra.

Pau, snap out of it!

You’ve got a diesel midget named Emeka checking you in the post and a trout-mouthed forward named Landry pushing you around. A formidable duo, no doubt, but nothing like that Dark Crystal vulture Kendrick Perkins or that fake thug KG in Boston.

Pau, please, put the Hornets out of their misery! Don’t give Chris Paul’s dome anymore hot air than it already has. Kill these cats in the paint…please!

Look at Game 5. The Hornets got 20+ out of three players and still got destroyed by 16. Just think how much worse it would have been with Pau the All-Star.

Pau, your time is now! You’re already in Laker Lore as the man that kept Kobe in Purple and Gold. Don’t trip. Your place in history is cemented. This is the time when you get arrogant by adding to your legendary resume.

Pau, please, throw down the hammer and nail the coffin shut on pro hoops in Louisiana this season.

The last thing we need is pointless Game 7. ABC might want the ratings but how many casual viewers are going to be tuned in when it’s 101-61 with 6 minutes left in the fourth?